I was at a wedding tonight and everyone on the dance floor seemed to know what to do with their hands while dancing. I just can’t seem to figure it out.
Maschendrahtzaun Maschendrahtzaun :(
I’d settle for a non-shy bladder (a social bladder? An extroverted bladder?)
I’ll trade you! I have to pee about every 20 minutes due to malnurishment as a kid.
Smooth joints, by the time I was 14 I already had clicky joints and now if I stand or sit in the wrong way I need to click them back in
My ankles, wrists, fingers and hips pop so loud the secret police would hear it from down the road and bust me in the attic
Executive function.
A properly functioning neocortex.
A functional pancreas. Worked perfectly fine for 27 years, then my body just decided it was evil. Super neat.
The ability to snap my fingers. I can barely make a sound when doing it.
Make an OK symbol with your middle finger
Move every finger except your index finger to your palm as close to your wrist as possible (in a comfortable manner)
Adjust your thumb so it is on the edge of your middle finger closer to your pinkie (this is to cause more friction between your middle finger and thumb)
Press down with your middle finger and then move your thumb, as quickly as possible, to around where your index finger is
If it works, it’ll cause some burning on your finger and a loud noise, you can massage your palm where the middle finger hits if it’s still muffled, it’s likely stiff.
Which finger do you use other than your thumb? I use my rong finger, but I’ve seen others that use the middle. I’m sure some wierdo is out there mastering the pointer thumb technique
the trick is long fingers. the longer, the bigger the snap
I feel like long fingers would also help out in other facets of life.
Can confirm, got long fingers, can reach the bottom of most jars.
A big fluffy tail.
I wish I didn’t have this giant penis.
I’m constantly tripping over mine
Well spit it out
Being an actual person where everything I do isn’t too fancy, wannabe grown, picky, spoiled, or out of my league. I want to wear fun clothes and makeup without everyone gawking at it for trying too hard to look like a real person, or everyone angry that it has nice things it doesn’t deserve. And probably the ability to enjoy music since I lost that after every single genre I enjoyed was either below society or trying too hard to be More Than.
People are useless stupid cunts
Slightly thicker wrists. Skinny wrists ruin the aesthetics of my arms.
Needlewrist Ned checking in
Legs. I’m a double amputee, and I miss them.
the trick is long legs. the longer, the more leg you can lose
I feel like long legs would also help out in other facets of life.
Like, if you have long pants
I would say that’s not really minor
Relatively? Yeah. It’s minor. Most people don’t even consider having legs.
Yeah highly disagree there lol
When was the last time you thought: hmm… I have legs. Outside of this post obviously
I dunno I guess every time I use them? Especially during work outs. There isn’t a single thing on me I would be willing to give up or consider “minor.” Unless it’s like eye or hair color. But to lose a finger or toe or a whole leg or both because I don’t spend 8h of my day contemplating their value to me is just not how I roll. Friendo.
A loving family
I was gonna write the same thing. You’re not alone on this one.
My heart goes out to you, sweet stranger. ❤️
I’m so sorry, right there with ya
As in parents or spouse and kids?
Hair
the trick is long hair. the longer, the more hair you’ll have
I feel like long hair would also help out in other facets of life.
