When you are a grown up you don’t realize you are watching your parents die.

Wash your hands in the bathroom, nobody bats an eye.

Scrub down your belt buckle in the sink and people lose their minds!

Imagine playing solitaire and everytime you flip the draw pile a 30 second unskippable online casino ad plays.

I remember I had a date with a girl back in the’10s. We hit it off and got back to her place. Wanted to show her a funny Internet video.

She brought out an ancient laptop that refused to boot and said her Ex had tried to fix it with Linux.

I got it pointed at the right dependencies, she fellated me as it updated.

I think this is my only sexy story that includes Linux.

Well, I guess there was this one time I loaned a lonely neighbor DOS 6 disks.

But, that does not include Linux.

When I encouraged my cat to embrace her fursona horrible things happened to my pillow.