• WolfLink@sh.itjust.works
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    18 hours ago

    When someone genuinely likes you they will listen to you talk for hours about anything just because they like hearing you be passionate about something.

  • Glytch@lemmy.world
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    17 hours ago

    what is he doing that I’m not?

    Having self confidence about his passions and being willing to talk about them with someone who might get it the first time. Believe it or not a lot of women like to listen to guys gush about their passions.

  • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org
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    23 hours ago

    I dated a woman much taller than me, and received an unnatural amount of glances at my crotch when we were out in public together.

    People are so ridiculous.

  • 2ugly2live@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Probably didn’t go in with the idea that the only way she would be interested in similar hobbies was for her to be whipped in some way and just treated her like a person. 🤷🏿‍♀️

  • Blackmist@feddit.uk
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    1 day ago

    Maybe he’s out there talking to women instead of hanging out on 4chan smoking weed all day…

    Strange how far that gets you.

    • Steve Dice@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      This reminds me of a time I had people over when my roommates, who happened to be 2 very attractive girls, went out and just secomds after they left, a guy said “How come you get to live with 2 extremely hot girls?!” and I was like “Because I don’t say shit like that”. Wanna know the best part? His girlfriend was there.

  • ace_of_based@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    Women actually like vg yo. I would know, i got my wife into them when we met (she hadn’t played games since she was a kid) and now, while i still take the crown in side-scrollin platformers and fighters? she whips my ass in shooters and it’s not actually close.

    • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
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      23 hours ago

      My wife would casually watch me play games until she saw me playing Rust with the bros. She shyly asked if I could build her a computer.

      Brother I had been building, fixing, and overclocking PCs for like 20 years by that point, a few a month even. I slapped one together from spare parts and got her in the game.

      She immediately used the fact that she is a girl to work her way into the good graces of other factions and made us friends I couldn’t have imagined. She would change her name and kill sleepers to make our enemies think they had been raided by other enemies. She would make friends with the resident assholes and then map out their base layout for us.

      My group has people in it like a top 10k solo no-build Fortnite player, a guy who regularly airdisked people 300m away in Tribes, and two top World of Tanks NA players: we are a force to be reckoned with on any day. She was armed with nothing but kindness and help for good people, and wrath for those who wronged good people.

      She fit right in.

      • KinglyWeevil@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        16 hours ago

        My wife beat me at MarioKart at a party in my apt. And well, that’s where it started lmao.

        Bitch didn’t even know how to drift and just snaked that victory out from under me.

    • sleepmode@lemmy.world
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      20 hours ago

      My wife destroys me in puzzle games, farm management sims and difficult platformers that make me rage like Spelunky. Any shooter however, she is a bit lost but she happily loots away and explores while I’m demolishing everything. It’s nice having a shared activity we can nerd out about.

  • Enkrod@feddit.org
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    1 day ago

    In my experience: He’s emotionally available, interested in her and her experience, actually listening, gentle and honest.

    I’m about the fattest, ugliest, loser nerd around and if I can be in a relationship with a succesful, beautiful, adventurous woman, so can anon.

      • Enkrod@feddit.org
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        1 day ago

        Meh, I’m like really heavy, dangerously so even, and my many health problems (which don’t help with the physical attractiveness) originate from that. So no, I’m ugly and fat and in many, many regards I’m a loser. But I have other things going for me.

        GF wants into this discussion, this is her words:

        I wouldn’t call him the fattest, ugliest, looser nerd, but he is definitely fat and doesn’t conform to any classic ideal of male beauty. Instead, he is very gentle, loving and tender and makes me feel like a goddess. He also does what he said he would do: he is interested in me, not just because he has to ask, he actually wants to know what I think and feel. And he is not afraid to tell me his feelings, honest and vulnerable, even if they are actually embarrassing and he may even be ashamed of them. He wants to connect with me emotionally, honest and with his whole heart.

        So I guess I’m making up for it with inner beauty and that’s precisely why I commented here:

        I had already given up on love, I was a 40 years old, depressed, fat nerd with a career going nowhere. Really not physically attractive at all. I’ve been where so many of these Anons are. But through my significant other and the ones before her, I learned that you really don’t need to be tall, fit and conventionally attractive to find love.

        “Just” respect your partner, be open, be honest, be gentle, be caring and be interested, really interested in what she thinks and does and feels.

        For me the hardest part was lowering my defenses and being vulnerable with her, telling her even the things that I thought she would find unmanly or disgusting, everything I was and am still ashamed of. And sometimes it’s really hard to actually listen, to not just hear but listen, to not let her voice be drowned out in the multitude of voices from inside and outside your own head and things and media and events happening around you every day. I’ve really had to learn (and am still learning) to come to a calm focus and practice active listening. It’s not easy, but I do it because I love her, and she’s given me the mental stability and something to look forward to that has helped me start not only my weight loss journey, but also continue to work at becoming a better person, better listener and the man I want to be for her.

        I’m far from perfect, I still mess things up, my weight loss progresses painfully slow, my mental health still has pretty bad days and I’ve fucked up listening again this week, just like last week. But I’ll be damned if I give up again. And she’s so incredibly supportive and appreciative, that I’m still wondering sometimes what the hell she sees in me and how I deserve someone so wonderful.

        • metallic_z3r0@infosec.pub
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          1 day ago

          Damn dude, seems like you’re still winning to me. Just having that support goes a long way, hope you can keep at the weight loss (progress is progress) and have more good mental health days than bad (the more you practice the easier it gets, even if it’s never easy).

      • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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        1 day ago

        Sometimes I hear Kevin Smith talking about himself in front of a crowd, and he immediately describes himself as this fat loser… and I always think bro, you’re doing fine - great even - stop putting yourself down in front of others, it makes everyone feel weird.

        • Enkrod@feddit.org
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          1 day ago

          Yeah well Kevin did weigh 257 pounds and is a successful director, producer, writer and actor… I’m north of 400 and none of those things. But I got other things going for me, so I’m okay with being a fat ugly loser, I’m winning what’s important to me.

          • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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            1 day ago

            Well I’m probably reading too much into it, but I just think that being publicly revulsed by yourself, even in jest, teaches others how to treat you.

            I know that going the other way is the path to narcissism/arrogance, and pointing out your faults keeps you humble and telegraphs that you have no defences because you dont need any… but I think that works only if you assume that people dont take others at face value. Which we all unfortunately do.

            Not really sure what I’m advising here, or what the middleground exactly is here, but hopefully you can see where I’m coming from

        • Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          Ugh, I just had a flashback to middle school, when my very attractive friend (who was already a model) complained that she was ugly because of an itty, bitty little zit she got one day.

          Meanwhile I sat there, a relative pizza-face, thinking: Seriously? If you are ugly, what does that make the rest of us?

          • JokeDeity@lemm.ee
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            1 day ago

            You’re right, but also, they weren’t faking it. My wife is gorgeous, but every single day we’ve been together she’s announced how fat and ugly she is (she’s neither). It’s a deep mental issue and they really believe that shit. Usually it’s caused by their parents at a young age. My wife’s family is really really gross with young girls. They all start playing in make-up by the age of 2. I’ve already seen it in her poor niece, calling herself ugly… She’s 4 and already has a completely fucked up mentality about beauty and her role in society. It’s soul crushing, and I knew it was going to happen the second she was born. I fear for us having a daughter and them doing this to her enough when I’m not around that she is affected the same way. I really hope I have a son for this reason, honestly.

            • Flagstaff@programming.dev
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              1 day ago

              Um, I hate to break it to you, but sons will think the same thing about themselves and simply not mention it. Source: me

              • JokeDeity@lemm.ee
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                1 day ago

                Fair point, however the family in question won’t be as ignorantly cruel to a son. They’ll probably fuck him up in some other ways, but at least not ones that cause him daily constant dread and depression.

                Also I hope things get better for your mental state, I’m sure you’re far more attractive than you believe, just like my wife and the girl in OP.

  • PhilipTheBucket@ponder.cat
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    2 days ago

    It’s hard to say from such a distance, but it may be that he is good at sex and trustworthy. That’s enough a lot of the time. People make things too complicated.

    • Endymion_Mallorn@kbin.melroy.org
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      2 days ago

      Can confirm. Source: am short white guy, my ex is a truly statuesque black woman. Only way I know it’s not about me is because I don’t bother with Fallout past 2.

      • kaosof@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Well see, that’s a real mistake.

        I can take or leave the others, but New Vegas is special. It has plenty of shortcomings, but it’s still the last good Fallout.

        • Endymion_Mallorn@kbin.melroy.org
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          1 day ago

          It’s an FPS. I’m totally uninterested in the gameplay.

          Unless it can be played as a 2D turn-based strategy RPG, I’m not going to bother with it. If they made a Geneforge 6 and made it an FPS, I’d be just as turned off. I feel the same way about Might & Magic vs. Heroes of Might & Magic.

          • Mongostein@lemmy.ca
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            1 day ago

            Have you tried Wasteland? I can’t remember the connection, but some of the developers were involved with or close the production of the first 2 Fallouts.

            These games feel like what Fallout would have become had they not changed to FP.

            I’m playing 3 right now. It’s great.

          • camr_on@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            There’s a playable version of Fallout Van Buren, the original fallout 3, that has a lot of the same story points, themes, and settings as New Vegas. I also recommend Wasteland 2 and 3 if you haven’t played them

          • LittleBorat3@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            But fallout has this function for people without hand eye coordination i.e. RPG players where you hit V and then you can pick the body parts to aim at.

              • Sylvartas@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                1 day ago

                You can use a third person camera but yeah it’s still a different pov.

                Have you tried Underrail ? It’s popular among the old school fallouts fans

              • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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                1 day ago

                How do you sniper an enemy in 2D turn-baaed RPG? The game map would have to zoom out a lot to get any sneak advantage

              • JokeDeity@lemm.ee
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                1 day ago

                It’s pretty clear after reading enough comments that you just aren’t interested in trying anything outside of your incredibly narrow selection of RTS and point and click games. That being said virtually every point you bring up is a non-issue with New Vegas because of the incredible mod library. Hell, I’m sure there’s a collection of mods to turn New Vegas into a top down RTS if you look. Just wanted to point out that bringing things up point by point will be an eternity because New Vegas is so customizable, you’ll save yourself time by just saying you don’t have interest in trying out new things you aren’t already experienced with.

                • prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works
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                  1 day ago

                  The person you’re responding to straight up already said “I’m disinterested in the game because it’s not what I wanted” and you’re out here arguing with them about having an opinion.

                  They only continued to explain themselves because people couldn’t accept they had a different opinion.

                  MAYBE just MAYBE you ought to allow others to be themselves.

      • JokeDeity@lemm.ee
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        1 day ago

        Brother, New Vegas is one of the greatest games ever created. There are probably a hundred hours worth of video essays on YouTube about why this game is a masterpiece. There’s a reason it has one of the biggest and still active Nexus Mods page. There’s a reason there’s an active online multiplayer mod of this game that came out in 2009. It’s fucking good.