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fossilesque@mander.xyzM to Science Memes@mander.xyzEnglish · 4 months ago

Polar bears

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Polar bears

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fossilesque@mander.xyzM to Science Memes@mander.xyzEnglish · 4 months ago
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  • The Giant Korean@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Bear is black, fight back.

    Bear is brown, turn around.

    Bear is white, say good night.

    • s_s@lemm.ee
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      4 months ago

      Also.

      Some black bears are brown.

      Some brown bears are black.

      Good luck everyone.

      • Prehensile_cloaca @lemm.ee
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        4 months ago

        Polar bears have black skin. Polar bears are black bears.

    • itslilith@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 months ago

      Turn around is a bad idea

      If it’s brown, lie down

      • The Giant Korean@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        I had heard it as turn around, but lie down makes much more sense.

    • lobut@lemmy.ca
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      4 months ago

      I remember somewhere they were saying you should remove your clothes (slowly piece by piece) with a polar bear. The bear will get distracted and start sniffing your clothes.

      I think it was a QI episode and then David Mitchell said something like that Polar Bear being happier in the fact that the human would be better to eat this time because it didn’t have a wrapper.

      • ilega_dh@feddit.nl
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        4 months ago

        That’s a myth perpetuated by the polar bears, they’re just perverts

  • HappyFrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    4 months ago

    I bet they gives good hugs :3

    • MintyFresh@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      It will keep you warm and cozy for the rest of your life!

      • Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        4 months ago

        Great source of vitamin A!

        • Mist101@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          Also vitamin AA, AAA, and AAAA.

          • tauren@lemm.ee
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            4 months ago

            Duracel picked a wrong mascot.

  • SektorC@discuss.tchncs.de
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    4 months ago

    • Klear@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Snapping out of your fantasy as you’re being eaten alive is a bad move.

  • dalekcaan@lemm.ee
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    4 months ago

    Also, one of the few animals that will hunt humans for food

    • Sirdubdee@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Can’t blame them. They’re running out of options.

  • FundMECFS@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    4 months ago

    Fun fact: Grizzlies and Polar Bears are the same species according to the Biological Species Concept.

    Meaning they interbreed in the wild (somewhat rare), and produce viable offspring that can have babies as well.

    We’re actually noticing this happening more and more with climate change. As Grizzly populations move further and further north, they’re encountering polar bears more often and are more likely to mate. Some scientists actually think within the next couple centuries due to arctic sea ice pretty much disappearing polar bears will either go extinct, or interbreed with grizzlies so much that there isn’t a “pure” polar bear left. Most likely a mix of both.

    • steal_your_face@lemmy.ml
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      4 months ago

      So are Neanderthals and homo sapiens the same species then?

      • bluewing@lemm.ee
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        4 months ago

        Close enough that we probably helped bred them out of existence. Neanderthal genetic markers show up with some regularity in certain modern human populations.

        Edit to add: While humans didn’t breed them out of existence, we certainly did intermix with them. And that does help to maintain their existence yet today.

  • BigBenis@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    180 seconds (3 minutes) is a hilarious overestimation of any fighter’s ability. Unless you’re counting the time it takes to bleed out.

    • Event_Horizon@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      10 seconds of fighting, 170 seconds of screaming while being ripped apart.

  • Oniononon@sopuli.xyz
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    2 months ago

    deleted by creator

  • Donebrach@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Fighting bears isn’t that common of an encounter. I’d be more worried about deer and coyotes or even a single cougar than the off chance of encountering a bear. They will definitely fuck you up but it’s not like they are starting their day to be like “Imma go murder a human” in the same way other urban-adjacent animals are—I think they just wanna get that sweet sweet pick-a-nic basket.

    dies from turkey assault

    • Holyhandgrenade@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Polar bears will absolutely try to hunt you. They’ll eat anything that moves. The only way to deal with a polar bear is a gun.

      • sus@programming.dev
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        4 months ago

        • kakler bitmap@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          The ancient drawing was by a caveman trying to convince his caveman bros that he could totally take a polar bear.

  • DengistDonnieDarko [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    4 months ago

    180 seconds feels extremely generous tbh

    • Barbecue Cowboy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 months ago

      Bear doesn’t view something our size as even remotely a threat. We’re assuming the bear isn’t hungry and just not that interested.

  • Mac@mander.xyz
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    4 months ago

    Motorcycle helmets are purposefully not-hard. Odd comparison.

    • Carl [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      4 months ago

      But they are pretty thick, since that means more impact-absorbing foam.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    4 months ago

    What kind of bear is that wearing the sunglasses?

    • And009@lemmynsfw.com
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      4 months ago

      Mama bear

  • stochastictrebuchet@sh.itjust.works
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    4 months ago

    Do not – and I really cannot stress this enough – give any of those bears cocaine

    • erotador@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 months ago

      instructions unclear, bears are now on pcp

      • Ignotum@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        A gallon of pcp?

        • SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de
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          4 months ago

          Didn’t even know they made it in liquid form

          • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today
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            4 months ago

            I dissolved it in Absinthe, seemed like a good idea at the time…

  • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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    4 months ago

    Your survival time would depend on how far apart you and the bear are, how’s fast you can run, and how angry or hungry the bear is.

    • 100_kg_90_de_belin@feddit.it
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      4 months ago

      Polar bears can reach 25 mph, I don’t see myself outrunning that.

    • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Polar bears hunt even when not hungry because of the general scarcity of food in their environment

  • casmael@lemm.ee
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    4 months ago

    *first floor windows don’t go nuts guys no way that lad is reaching all the way to the second floor

    • v_krishna@lemmy.ml
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      4 months ago

      Is the US the first floor is the ground floor, second floor is what is called the 1st floor in many other countries

    • Deebster@infosec.pub
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      4 months ago

      Calling something a “second storey” just sounds weird, although at least because they spelt it “story” we know they mean in the US sense.

  • mathemachristian [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    4 months ago

    Why’s the black bear so sad?

    • TankieTanuki [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      4 months ago

      It’s forced to play the humiliating role of smallest-by-comparison.

      • mathemachristian [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        4 months ago

        oh anf the human is just a little snack?

        I just realised its a photo not a drawing picard

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