- cross-posted to:
- memes@lemmy.ml
- cross-posted to:
- memes@lemmy.ml
You must log in or register to comment.
I wouldn’t say a word because women don’t interest me, only men do (as I’m gay). I’d just be distracted by my phone and ride the elevator in peace before departing on my chosen floor.
I’m too smart for this. I would take them back to my hotel room, have a fun time, and then ghost the hell out of them.
My line of work does involve trade secrets and stuff. I’m pretty sure I’d be able to have sex without the temptation of booting up and unlocking my work computer though.
I certainly wouldn’t try to do business with them. I just want to nut. Is it that wrong to want to have a threesome with foreign intelligence assets? I’d even thank them for making that specific fantasy come true once we’re done.
I’m just kidding though, these women are not my type. They’d need to entice me with an autistic girl who loves trains as much as I do, and I’m already married to one so they’re too late anyway.
Politely nothing. If they want to know my secrets, they will have to work for it. That way I’m also not bothering some strangers who don’t deserve to be randomly harassed.
Jensen Huang enters the chat
I wouldn’t even acknowledge them.
Um, this elevator is taken, you will need to wait for the next one.
Than fart real loud.
a smile and nod and then right back to my phone screen?
why would you use an “opener” on random people getting into an elevator with you?
Did you catch the game last night?
Do you like hot fudge Sundays?
Ever seen a guy eat his own head?
Is the police still waiting outside?
What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on that early?
The thing about Arsenal is they always try to walk it in
you mean Dune: Awakening?
Yeah, you hit on them when they’re getting OUT of it. Don’t want to make them feel uncomfortable and trapped.
Door closes
You mumble, “Your outfit matches your notebook, and I think that’s really cute.” It echoes in the empty elevator. You’ll keep thinking about that cute number, but not as long as you’ll regret missing the opportunity to have said it to her face. That kind of compliment has the potential to really brighten a person’s day.
One of the best things about transitioning is that now I can compliment people’s clothes without them thinking I’m trying to boink them.
Sometimes that outfit just really complements your skin tone, you know?
Its called shooting your shot
I don’t have a gun, and even if I had one, why would I shoot random people?
if you have to resort to harassing strangers who are trapped in an elevator with you, then you are far too ugly to be “shooting your shot”.
You can see if theyre interested by talking to them. Shooting your shot doesnt mean flashing and hoping for sex. Do you know how to socialize?
you think women want to socialize with strange men in an elevator? who is your favorite manosphere influencer?
Now youre just assuming. Touch grass.
and you’re assuming that women would feel safe with you harassing them in a cramped space. why don’t you head over to !womensstuff@piefed.blahaj.zone and ask them how they would feel about that.
I’m sorry for whatever trauma you went through that makes you feel like someone standing in an elevator is strange and predatory.
“Ugly people don’t deserve love” so says the moth???
sexual predators should have the right to harass people who are trapped with them, so says the voxie?
If you try “openers” on women walking into elevators like a captive audience you deserve to die in a fire
Did you ever consider thinking something is gross without wishing a painful death on the perpetrator?
Edit: of course they didn’t. Being a zealot who wants to kill their “enemies” is fine and also very worthy of many upvotes. Of course I’m evil for pointing out how fucked this is.
I’m of the opinion it should be painful or death. People who try to pick up ladies, preach, etc to a captive audience do need the pain as they ignore words. It’s the behavior that leads to bigger problems and needs to be nipped in the bud.
That’s fucked up
Letting them live is how we get Trump, fire is much better
Counter point:
I always liked this elevator. It picks me up when I’m down.In a fancy hotel, a boy got on and told the elevator operator that he was staying on the top floor. When the doors opened the operator said “Your floor, son.” The boy asked why he called him son, and the operator replied, “Well, didn’t I bring you up?”
Counter counterpoint:
Unfortunately it always brings me down when I’m up.Got it to move sideways. When I passed out drunk.
Oh, the dad’s gambit.
A captive audience for 15 seconds at which point they have a built-in reason to leave though
but where else am i going to meet someone
the only opener allowed is the open door button
I’d say to them the same thing I say to anyone else.
“Hi. What floor? Have a good night.”
What is this, an Axe commercial?
Most men do
Can’t speak for other men but I cum with my prostate.
The pee is stored in the balls.
Removed by mod
What would you prefer, one of the mass-produced goth girls from the goth girl industrial complex?
1 goth girl please. Any quality will do, even if its a ticktok counterfeit.
Now we’re talking.
Um, uh, wha- uh who uhhh who’s this?
I have a blouse just like this one
Clearly
Well fuck, you guys are gonna see me on the news for leaking secrets if that’s on the table
…for legal reasons, that was a joke
I’m into tomboys.
Removed by mod
New Popular is still more interesting than Old Popular.
If they want to honeypot me, they’re going to need fursuits.
For real, I’d continue staring at my phone
I move to the side and brace for the most shrill pair of voices whose conversations consist mostly of “oh my gawd” “I’m like, really” and them complaining about what most other people would consider less than a mild inconvenience
Can you believe that guy in the lobby didn’t hold the door open for us?
I take my job very seriously. They’re gonna have to work pretty hard if they want that blend of 11 herbs and spices.
Is that what kids are calling it these days?
MAGA face. Not even once.
Hit all the buttons then run on the next floor.
